This is going to be kind of a storytime/ advice/ lifelesson post. Personal nevertheless. I have written about this story in some form earlier, probably about a year ago. Going back to your ex. I thought I’d discuss some pros/cons in this post.
First of all, my story (the short version anyway). My first love and I had been broken up for well over a year. We were in the same highschool so we’d stayed friends and slowly gotten over the tough part. We were in a somewhat okay place. Then we had a couple of summernights where we were hanging out and just sort of went back to each other for two nights. Very passionate, safe, and just full of love. The first love kind of love, that always lingers there. Then some things happened and we just left it at that, as two amazing nights we won’t forget but will probably not repeat.
I have to say I would’ve expected more negatives to come from this thing that some would concider a “relapse” or a fallback. One immediate negative was that some of our nearest and dearest who found out about it weren’t happy about it. Concerned, understandably, but with these things you feel like you want to be able to make your own mistakes (if that’s what they ultimately are). Another con is something I have recently discovered. The could’ve, would’ve, should’ve’s. If I would have told him it meant something to me instead of saying the exact opposite, would it had led to something more? Could I be in a happy commited relationship right now? These are of course thoughts that mostly only cross my mind on bad, lonely and sad days. Or at reflecting times like this.
I personally believe that going back to my ex has given me more than it’s taken. It has proven to me that our love truly was as big as I thought before, if not bigger. It has let me know that someone can actually care about me so much and want to go back to me (which I had a hard time believing before). Most importantly though, it gave me some amazing memories and now, whenever I think about my first love, this is the newest and clearest memory I have. Not the breakup, not his tears, not our fights, but these moments where we were just looking into each other’s eyes and there was just me and him in the world, and we were so lucky to have each other again even just temporarily.
Now I am by no means telling you to go for it. An on and off again relationship can be completely foolish. I am simply sharing my experience and my thoughts. For me this was an amazing experience. Maybe it could be the same for you, maybe not.
Have you ever been in a similar situation? What did you do? How did it end? Thoughts? xxx
theoceansyoumade 